Miss AP's Diary

Miss AP’s Gent’s Guide

Miss AP’s Gent’s Guide

Good Evening, Gentlemen. Christmas is coming. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to lavish your target with lingerie of the very highest level of luxury.

Gathering Intelligence
Identify your target. Become acquainted with her habits, her strengths, her weaknesses. Is she blushing and skittish or bold and adventurous? Does she keep her cards close to her chest or lay them out on the table? Is luxury lace the chink in her armour, or is she easily distracted by the sparkle of a faceted hand-sewn crystal? Be meticulous in your research, and your target will become easier to ensnare.

Classified Information
How to find out her size? The key quality to employ here is stealth. If you live with her you must do the following: take off your shoes. Creep into the bedroom. Slowly and carefully slide open her lingerie drawer. Stop, and listen for any oncoming danger. Remove one bra and one pair of knickers and locate the size label. Memorize the size but also type it into your iPhone as you will probably forget it immediately.
If you do not live with her then your covertness is even more important: you will have to read her bra size while removing it with your teeth in the midst of the throes of passion.

The Double-Pronged Approach
The cardinal rule when buying lingerie is to always buy the pair. What use is the bra without a pair of knickers? More advanced lingerie buyers will aim for triple agent status and buy the suspenders to match.

The 00 Agents
Always be ready to learn from the elite. Book an appointment with one of our in-store Agents: Agent Provocateur’s experts will guide you through the lingerie-buying process from sizing to seduction style and from full cups to French knickers. If you fear the implicit threat of the public arena, you can always pick up the phone and call our online Agents – but be wary of phone tapping.

The Secret Service
Worried about being discovered? Agent Provocateur sends all its parcels in discreet, unbranded brown paper packaging so that no suspicions are raised.

The Honey Trap
You don’t even need golden handcuffs to get her exactly where you want her once your pink and black parcel has fallen into the right hands.

The Sting Operation
Want to add some bite to your lavish gift? A crystal whip or a patent paddle is the perfect addition to some naughty lingerie, and will leave a deep and smarting impression on her, long after the Christmas tree has been taken down.

Risk Management
Don’t worry about getting it wrong. We offer a special Christmas returns policy meaning she can change anything that isn’t right until January 13th. So even if your sizing isn’t exactly spot on, it’s still mission accomplished