Miss AP's Diary

The Perfect Striptease – A Showgirl’s Guide

The Perfect Striptease – A Showgirl’s Guide

All sorts of high-jinks and frolics occur at The Salon, and if I’m honest, the Showgirl is normally right at the centre of it all. Which is why she is just the woman to sit down and grill for her hints and tips as to how to pull off the perfect striptease. Because every woman should have a little party trick up her sleeve.

Your costume
Layer up. Salome’s famous dance wouldn’t have lasted long if she was only wearing three veils, now would it? My absolute essentials are: knickers, bra, suspenders, stockings, high heels, silk robe. Optional extras include long gloves, nipple pasties, corset, school uniform, etc. Take your time – this is your show.’
Miss AP’s Tip: Always remember to put your knickers on over your suspenders. For convenience.

Your playlist
‘It’s not about what Dita Von Teese plays in her Burlesque show, or Kate Moss dancing to the White Stripes (though by all means, look at both of these on Youtube for inspiration). This has to be a song that makes YOU feel sexy whether it’s Morcheeba or Metallica.’
Miss AP’s Tip: Portishead Glory Box is always a winner.

Practice Makes Perfect
Don’t attempt to stage a strip tease until you have had a little practice first. You need to be able to get out of your underwear without getting all tangled up in it and falling flat on your face, and more importantly, you need to have the moves. It’s good to try out your dance in the mirror first. Walk slow, whip hair, bend over, use a chair – you might learn things about yourself you never knew.
Miss AP’s Tip: Remember the words of the great Arnold Schwarzenegger to Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies: ‘Let your hands be your lover’s hands on your own skin as you move.’

Learn from the best
From Salma Hayek’s incredible trick of pouring tequila down her leg and into her victim’s mouth, to Rebecca Romijn’s hip thrusting, these are six of my favourite ever strip teases.

1. Natalie Portman in Closer: That wig, those splits.
2. Kate Moss in The White Stripes I Just Don’t Know What to do with Myself: Because it’s Kate Moss.
3. Rebecca Romijn in Femme Fatale: Nifty little trick with her bra worth taking note of.
4. Dita Von Teese in Anything: Girl knows how to take her clothes off.
5. Jamie Lee Curtis in True Lies: Goddess
6. Salma Hayek in From Dusk Til Dawn: Snake hips and an actual snake = ultimate slink.