Miss AP's Diary
Dressing From the Knickers Out
It’s come to my attention that wearing no knickers on the red carpet is currently de rigueur. Gwyneth Paltrow graciously brought the trend to the world’s attention when she wore that bumless Berardi number at the Iron Man 2 premiere in April of last year. Polish supermodel and author of sex bible 25 Magazine wore a slashed-to the-hipbone Antony Vaccarello number to the Met Ball two years ago, and only the other night I ran into Diane Kruger at the Met Gala afterparty wearing a red hot slip of a number with sheer panels running perilously close to her labia majora. Now that Miley Cyrus has officially made those the new cleavage, I can only throw my hands in the air and concede to the trend.
However, I have always enjoyed dressing for an occasion from the knickers out. Start with a good pair of knickers and the rest will follow, that’s my mantra. So for example, next week I’ll be in Cannes for a couple of nights for the film festival. I know I want to wear my new Sandra French knickers for the occasion (sticking to a theme is always a good place to start). To go with the knickers I have selected a full-skirted semi-sheer McQueen gown, which perfectly complements the bordello-chic of the delicate French knicker. The following night I’m invited to a dinner as the date of a French count, and I plan to wear my Whitney ouvert knickers because, well, he is extremely handsome. I always feel vintage Alaïa is the right match for Whitney’s high-wattage bondage appeal – only a short black and tight number could possibly do justice to such a formidable pair of knickers.
Of course I do realise that not all of us will be flitting around on the Cannes red carpet, but the principle of dressing from the knickers-out should apply for any occasion. Here’s a run-down of my basic rules.
First date: The Cendrillon knickers can never fail to make you feel like a supercharged sexual siren – just one trip to the bathroom and a glimpse of them in the mirror will remind you who is in charge of the dating situation. Over them you could throw on a simple pair of skinny black jeans and you’ll still feel like a goddess.
Job interview: You need something reliable for this, a no-fuss knicker that will leave no lines underneath your tight-fitting pencil skirt. The Alina thong has never failed me yet, caressing my skin with whispers of lace that soothe and comfort as I settle in for a grilling.
Long-haul flight: Comfort is of paramount importance here, but you should never discount the possibility of some mile-high manoeuvres, so a short style brief that curves alluringly around the bottom cheeks is the ideal choice here. I like the Luna – it’s satisfyingly full to wear under cashmere tracksuit pants, but the side slits and flickers of lace make it a showstopper when you’re 35,000 miles high.
Booty call: There’s no glossing over what’s going to happen here, so wear a pair of side-tie knickers and be done with it.