Miss AP's Diary

Amongst Women

Amongst Women

“No boys allowed – this is a lime daiquiri and bowls of hummus affair”

Who’s on your fantasy dinner party list? No boys allowed – this is a lime daiquiri and bowls of hummus affair, with Janis Joplin and Lorde on the stereo and scented candles in every room. This is a dinner party for X Chromosomes only, where girltalk can take centre stage in a mutual appreciation society for sisters who are doing it for themselves – and for all of womankind.

My guest list:

Caitlin Moran – ever since reading How To Be A Woman I idolise her, and not just because she name-checked Agent Provocateur in Chapter 4.  She manages to make Third Wave Feminism funny – and that, ultimately, is how to drive the message home.

Sheryl Sandberg – the Lean In author and COO of Facebook is not only a self-made billionaire and a mother of two, but she describes herself on Twitter as a ‘friend to many great women.’ I would like to contrive a situation in which she becomes my friend.

Adele – for after-dinner tunes and bawdy chat.

Aung San Suu Kyii – The Burmese politician gave up family for country when she was placed under house arrest and separated from her husband and two sons for twenty years. Even though I imagine she won’t be downing the daiquiris and making lewd jokes down at the Moran end of the table, I would like to learn from her self-containment and bask in her quiet power.

Jennifer Lawrence – She’s every girl’s imaginary BFF and rumour has it is the owner of a very extensive collection of sex toys.

Miuccia Prada – the most intellectual of designers, her SS14 collection was devoted to ‘inspiring women to struggle’. I imagine her dinner conversation to be every bit as sparkling as one of her jewel-encrusted bra tops (worn over coats because it’s not for sex you know).

Dr Ruth – How could you not invite a woman who preaches, “The principal concern for women is not having an orgasm. But a woman has to take responsibility for her own orgasms.”

Michelle Lamy – an intoxicating French woman who has been amongst other things a rapper, a stripper, a lawyer, a muse, a restaurateur, a poet, and the wife of designer Rick Owens who is thirty years her junior. She smells like opium and her hands are tattooed black. Any dinner party of wonderful women would be made more racy by her presence.

 Hilary Clinton – because she just might get to be president.

No boys allowed – this is a lime daiquiri and bowls of hummus affair